And with 27 Years of Experience...
So it is a celebration of 27 years this Friday for one Duncan McAllister, or what some people would call, my birthday. For this special event I thought I would dispense a little bit of life experience for all the young readers out there. It is going to be a little like that 'wear sunscreen' song by Baz Luhrman a few years back. Ok, like 7 years back.
I would like to take a moment to let everybody know to wear sunscreen.
That is all.
Goodnight.
What's that? You were looking for more tidbits of wisdom? OK, let me see what I have in here.
(Imagine me searching through an old gym bag)
Let's see...
Always keep your sense of humour with you at all times. It is the best weapon to diffuse many difficult situations and is a great party trick.
Change the oil in your car more than once a year. I know that sounds like such a hassle but trust me, it will be better in the long run.
Don't try and sleep with every girl you meet. This will only cause you to have very few friends when your time is up.
Don't fall in the dump. (That posting was a true story)
If you do fall in the dump, even if you don't think you are hurt, try and get to a doctor. (I couldn't drink soda for a year after that)
Don't be afraid to talk to a girl now and then.
Everybody gets rejected, don't take it personally. (She was a bitch anyway)
Get a good dentist. It makes those trips a million times easier to make.
Watch the news every now and then and keep yourself educated, but try and follow that up with about 2 to 3 episode of the Simpsons or the Family Guy so you don't fall into depression.
Don't watch every movie expecting an Oscar film. Watch movies for what they are and escape the world for two hours. No, they do not have magic tickets in reality, but Last Action Hero is freaking hilarious.
If a girl tries to ask you out, don't say no because you watch wrestling with your buddy on Friday night's. (I am an idiot)
Even if you hate to dance try and make an effort to go to your senior prom.
Believe what you want to believe, just don't preach it to me.
If you do not believe in evolution, do not go watch the movie about volcanoes then, or for that matter, anything that might offend you. As a follow up comment, change the freaking channel if you do not like what is on.
Keep your friends close and your enemies, lose their number, why even keep them around.
Always look ahead in life and be ready to change direction. That way when you get your ass fired it is less of a shock.
Go to bed early rather than sleeping in late.
It you want to surf porn make sure you close the door.
Follow your dreams until you are 21 years old, then get new dreams, or maybe lower your standards.
And finally, to steal a quote from Darryl Lennox,
"You know who cares less about your problems than you? Everybody."
I would like to take a moment to let everybody know to wear sunscreen.
That is all.
Goodnight.
What's that? You were looking for more tidbits of wisdom? OK, let me see what I have in here.
(Imagine me searching through an old gym bag)
Let's see...
Always keep your sense of humour with you at all times. It is the best weapon to diffuse many difficult situations and is a great party trick.
Change the oil in your car more than once a year. I know that sounds like such a hassle but trust me, it will be better in the long run.
Don't try and sleep with every girl you meet. This will only cause you to have very few friends when your time is up.
Don't fall in the dump. (That posting was a true story)
If you do fall in the dump, even if you don't think you are hurt, try and get to a doctor. (I couldn't drink soda for a year after that)
Don't be afraid to talk to a girl now and then.
Everybody gets rejected, don't take it personally. (She was a bitch anyway)
Get a good dentist. It makes those trips a million times easier to make.
Watch the news every now and then and keep yourself educated, but try and follow that up with about 2 to 3 episode of the Simpsons or the Family Guy so you don't fall into depression.
Don't watch every movie expecting an Oscar film. Watch movies for what they are and escape the world for two hours. No, they do not have magic tickets in reality, but Last Action Hero is freaking hilarious.
If a girl tries to ask you out, don't say no because you watch wrestling with your buddy on Friday night's. (I am an idiot)
Even if you hate to dance try and make an effort to go to your senior prom.
Believe what you want to believe, just don't preach it to me.
If you do not believe in evolution, do not go watch the movie about volcanoes then, or for that matter, anything that might offend you. As a follow up comment, change the freaking channel if you do not like what is on.
Keep your friends close and your enemies, lose their number, why even keep them around.
Always look ahead in life and be ready to change direction. That way when you get your ass fired it is less of a shock.
Go to bed early rather than sleeping in late.
It you want to surf porn make sure you close the door.
Follow your dreams until you are 21 years old, then get new dreams, or maybe lower your standards.
And finally, to steal a quote from Darryl Lennox,
"You know who cares less about your problems than you? Everybody."
posted by Duncan McAllister at 10:07 p.m.
3 Comments:
"Believe what you want to believe, just don't preach it to me."
Amen (laughing)
And what news are you watching that you think is educating you? all the news here is crap.
Happy Birthday Big Boy!
27 are you Dunk? Time to act your age? Cyril
Maybe some people should worry about their typos before taking a jab at someone...
I may be biased, but I can pretty much agree with a lot of those words of wisdom--some from personal experience. Except that I've never fallen into a dump. Maybe a river? Quite possible. I do remember falling down a 20 ft. rock embankment and hitting my head on the sidewalk at the bottom. That could explain some things...
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